I don’t want to call the whole thing off

Did any of you see Annabelle Gurwitch on Bill Maher last Friday? If her name isn’t ringing a bell, and for my sake I hope it isn’t, she used to host that old show on TBS, Dinner and a Movie, and is now the face of Wa$ted! on Planet Green.

She wasn’t particularly funny on Real Time but that’s not really the point. The point is, that she and her husband signed a six-figure deal with the Crown Publishing Group to write their memoir, You Say Tomato, I Say Shut Up. The book was published in February 2010.

This is so frustrating for me because I have been sitting on a similar themed book now for five years that I’ve been too frightened to send out. I started kvetching about marriage way before these two did and I have a zero-figure deal with no publishing group. Sure, there is very little art that is purely original anymore and bookstore shelves are filled with similar books on the same topic because they are important topics that will always be relevant. But let’s be honest-how many below average looking Jewish girls, with thick black glasses and who are moderately funny does the world really need? From Annabelle’s performance last week, I would say not many.

I have this shirt!

This personae has been taken off the market by someone who is likely funnier than I am, a stronger writer than I am and given an article of hers in Glamour, is probably better in bed than I am. Of course, we all know whose fault this is- it’s obviously my husband’s for not suggesting that we write my book together.

I never ever give up but, lacking confidence, I am easily discouraged. Lately though, I have done some brave things and I want to use whatever momentum I have to stop myself from feeling low. This time, I refuse to let my spirit be pulled down by the undertow of despair. Who better to look to for inspiration than Annabelle herself who, having been fired by Woody Allen, published a book of essays inspired by that dismissal called Fired! Tales of the Canned, Canceled, Downsized and Dismissed.

She spun that book into an Off-Broadway play, touring show and documentary film that has been screened everywhere from The South West Film Festival to The Department of Labor on Capitol Hill. That’s amazing. If I was ever fired by Woody Allen I don’t think I would ever leave the house again, assuming I could still afford it.

As a new Wendy though, I am going to take a page out of Annabelle’s book and persevere. I am going to turn lemons into lemonade. Or perhaps, in my and Annabelle’s case, pasta into kugel. Whatever the saying, I’m going to keep going. I’m going to keep doing what I love because I love it and I know deep down that with so much passion in my soul I have a lot to offer. If someone tells me they don’t like my prose, they don’t like my style, and they don’t think I will ever make it as a writer, well you know what?

I say Shut Up!